It is 2006, and it is my third year overseas. I am quite surprised how much I have changed over the years, and how much I have still remained the same.
Coming abroad has really made me more independent, both in terms of living as well as personal thinking and outlook. I remembered the times - both good and bad - when I have to learn to grow up, think rationally and make major decisions. Going through the experiences, getting hurt sometimes, feeling happy sometimes, is something that I will cherish always. They made me grow, and made me change for better.
Growing up is such an interesting thing. As I grow older, I no longer hold too tightly to some 'philosophies' I used to have about the world, instead, the outlook about life, the thinking about this world, the principle of my life, grow to a higher level maturity and openness. Yet, there is still so much more to learn in life, to experience and to try out, to make changes, to do something that matters. Lying ahead is a long stretch of road I will embark on. This is the path of my life, and I want to walk it well.
Interestingly, along the way, I discovered my inner strength, and rediscovered my dreams. Somehow the dream to make an impact of change in life is not a faraway dream. Somehow the childhood dream of writing books to initiate changes is not impossible. Somehow, my dreams are achievable, if I have the will to go for it.
Sitting down reflecting, reviewing the past, and at the same time thinking ahead, might sound like a procrastination. But as I look back, look ahead, and look where I am standing, I can reposition myself to the right direction I wish to head to.
As usual, I do not do resolutions of new year. I just wish for clarity of mind to make decisions, wholesomeness of heart to care, and health to carry on living this life.
Happy New Year.
13 comments:
Looking back at what I have just written, I wonder... What the heck I have just been blabbering about??? It's not a review, it's not a resolution, and I hope I have not confused too many people trying to read this post...
Perhaps catching up with assignments and courseworks have finally got its toll on me.
happy new year.
I enjoyed reading ur blog and the last paragraph is great...
"As usual, I do not do resolutions of new year. I just wish for clarity of mind to make decisions, wholesomeness of heart to care, and health to carry on living this life." - Hope u get what u want...
Thank you Isabel. I enjoyed yours too. Such a refreshing way to describe a new year as a beginning of no ending. Beautiful cycle of life, isnt it?
Happy new year!
不單只是小孩,學生去經歷成長..而是每個人也在天天成長中. (活到老,學到老)呀!!!
舊的已成過去…我們所能做的是珍惜今天…展望明天.
正如那首歌---->(明天會更好!!!!!!!!)
尊璣
It will be a good one. And more.
Happy New Year!
Reading this post really made me think back over the years I've spent here in the Land of the Rising Sun and how it has affected me, good or bad. I think separating yourself completely from your home and living surrounded by a completely different culture really helps you learn more about who you really are so you can find and develop your true potential.
What kind of person would I be now if I had stayed in the U.S. instead of coming here and chasing dreams? Well, for one thing, I'd be a lot narrower. I'd probably be a lot duller, too.
On the other hand, I've actually encountered hostility from people back home. I've had old friends and relatives tell me that I'm no longer American. I've been told that my way of thinking and acting is now "wrong" because I've been "twisted" by the foreign culture I live in. A few individuals have even gone so far as to indirectly (or even directly) accuse me of treason and say that I'm "not needed" back in the U.S.A..
That hurts. But frankly, such narrow thinking is something I know I don't need. I've grown beyond that "life in one's own backyard" mentality. Perhaps, in that respect, they are right.
You have the right idea, YD. Recall the past, but don't drown in it. Learn from it while you look ahead to the new challenges you've made possible by breaking away from it.
Besides, resolutions are overrated.
尊璣,
写得真贴切! '明天会更好'是我很喜欢的一首歌. 充满了希望, 和爱. 祝福你, 惜缘, 惜福!
Low,
Best wishes to you too! some tomorrows in the future, i'll book you for a trip in FRIM, or just sitting down n chat the day away. :-)
Moody,
People resist changes. I remembered I too used to have apprehension when first encountered foreign place and culture. But later when I let go of the hesitation, I found a wide scope of learning opportunities, without boundaries!
(somehow reminds me of Newton's first law about the resistance of change of states...)
People might accuse you of being un-American, but I think you are wonderful. You have integrated into the local culture, but without losing your own roots and values. That is the essence of adaptibility which enables you to be open-hearted to learn not only about your own values, but also other people values. We need more people like this, rather than those with "life in one's own backyard" mentality.
Well, to put it in a short way, wouldn't it be great if people can tolerate new, foreign cultures, compare with own culture, choose the good ones and discard the bad ones... and viola! a better culture is born - for both 'local' or 'foreign'? this would help solve lots of animosity and hostility among countries...
perhaps i m just dreaming. but my perspective of seeing international integration is that each of us brings something of our own to this world, shares and exchanges with others, and brings something beneficial back. in the middle of these activities, we might have just created some sort of synergy.
(i think i have just gone into a blabbering mode again)
Not unclear at all YD. To the contrary, and a far more useful attitude than making meaningless resolutions that go unkept year after year.
The mind attaches to patterns of thinking and behaivior and as you say resists change. Even to the point of attacking anyone who changes or is different from them as Moody can attest.
So I think you are wise (as usual) to mark the new year by reaffirming to keep you mind open and take each new experience as it comes. I will try to do the same, though at times, for this irascible old Panda, it takes a lot of work.
Thanks, YD.
I remembered that when I left home at the age of 18 to serve the army in Thailand, the land of Angels, my nagging machine told me this:
1. Don't do stupid things
2. Don't learn bad habits
3. Don't smoke and drink
And I told her, I can do all that in Singapore too and need not go so far to these.
So how long more do you need to stay there?
Thanks Panda. Your words are too kind. Sometims, unconsciously, I do resist changes too, and other people would have to point that out to me too. It is always nice to have friends who are open to give truthful opinions, and having faith on the friendship that can withstand both good and bad comments.
I thank you for your many wise comments and thinking. You might not have realized it, but you have helped me a lot in learning in life. Thanks so much dear.
Robin,
Yup! Agree with you in our own choices to be good/bad anywhere anytime. I remembered there's a Cantoness phrase that says, "If a cow does not want to drink water, who can force its head down?"
This is my final year for undergraduate. Next step will be going back to Malaysia to work. But I am now appealing to my sponsor to defer my service for 1 year, so that I can do a year of Master programme. Fingers crossed.
FRIM? Well you are most welcome! You are right about the cow thingy, so make sure you don't complain if the jungle treks are tough, hehe...
And yes, maybe it's about time for you to have teh tarik in some mamak while chatting away! Sounds like good 2006 already!!! :)))
yd, doing a reflection of one's life is really a good practice. It's like doing a rerun of one's life and knowing where we went wrong, picking up lessons learned along the way and going forward in life with more wisdom.
Like the song says "I wished I knew then what I knew now"! But then again life wouldn't be half as much fun.
But even now I am not so sure if I really knew! Life happens.
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